Weird Texas Laws You Won’t Believe Are Real!

If you’ve spent any time in Texas, you probably already know that we do things our own way. From massive BBQ feasts to Friday night football culture, there’s just something unique about the Lone Star State. But what if I told you that Texas also has some of the strangest, most outdated laws you’ve ever heard of?

Yep, we’re talking about laws that make you scratch your head and go, “Wait, WHAT?” 🤨

So grab a Dr Pepper (because that’s what we drink down here) and let’s dive into some of the most bizarre laws in Texas, and trust me, you’re gonna want to stick around for the last one because it’s next-level ridiculous.

Liquor Laws in Texas: Why Can't I Buy Booze on a Sunday?

Let’s start with something that catches a lot of newcomers off guard: liquor stores in Texas are closed on Sundays. Yep, if you want to buy a bottle of whiskey or a six-pack for game day, you’d better plan ahead because once the clock strikes midnight on Saturday, you're out of luck.

But wait..it gets weirder.

You CAN buy beer and wine on Sundays, but only after noon (because apparently, the state wants to make sure you’ve gone to church first).
If you’re at a restaurant or bar, you can drink before noon on Sundays, but ONLY if you order food. That mimosa at brunch? Gotta come with some eggs and bacon, folks.
And, just to really keep you on your toes, liquor stores close at 9 PM every other day of the week, so if you work late and forget to grab your bottle of tequila. Well, too bad.

Why does Texas have these laws? Who knows. But we Texans love our traditions, even when they don’t make a whole lot of sense.

Wait, I Can't Buy a Car on Sundays Either?

If you thought not being able to buy alcohol on Sundays was strange, buckle up, because you also can’t buy a car on Sundays.

That’s right—Texas law requires auto dealerships to be closed one day a weekend, and most pick Sunday. Why? Well, apparently, car salesmen needed a mandatory day of rest… you know, back when selling a horse and buggy was an extreme sport.

Fast forward to today, and this outdated law just means if your car dies on a Sunday, you better hope your sneakers have good mileage because you're waiting until Monday.

**Moral of the story:** If you need a new truck, don’t procrastinate—Sundays are for rest, not car shopping.

Giving Your Crime Victim a Heads-Up (Wait, WHAT?)

This one is so bizarre I had to triple-check it. Apparently, Texas once had a law that required criminals to give their victims 24-hour written or verbal notice before committing a crime.

Yeah, let’s imagine how that conversation would go:

"Hey, just a heads-up, I’ll be robbing your house tomorrow at 8 PM. Just thought you should know."

Good luck finding a criminal polite enough to follow that rule!

Want to Adjust Your Stockings? Think Again.

Ladies, if you’re ever in Denison or Bristol, Texas, be careful about adjusting your stockings in public. Apparently, it could land you in jail for up to a year.

…Now, I have questions.

Who was out here fidgeting with their stockings so aggressively that lawmakers felt the need to ban it outright? Did it cause mass chaos? A distraction of epic proportions?

We may never know, but if you ever find yourself in Denison, keep your hands off those stockings just to be safe.

No Selling Your Eyeballs (or Other Body Parts, for That Matter)

In Texas, it’s illegal to sell your own eyeballs.

Yep. Not just your eyeballs, but any part of your body. So if you were thinking of making a little extra cash by selling a kidney or a lung. Yeah, don’t do that.

On one hand, I’m glad we have this law because, you know, black market organ sales aren’t great. But on the other hand, how often was this happening that they felt the need to write it into law?

Makes you wonder. 🤔

No Drinking While Standing (Yep, You Read That Right)

Over in LeFors, Texas, it’s illegal to take more than three sips of beer while standing.

So… can you sit and chug the whole thing?

Or maybe crouch after the third sip?

I have so many questions about how this law came to be. Maybe it was an attempt to keep things “civil” in bars back in the day. Or maybe some guy took one too many sips standing up and things went downhill fast.

Either way, if you’re ever in LeFors, sit down before you take that fourth sip, okay?

No Shooting Buffalo From the Second Floor of a Hotel

Ah yes, an important law for our times.

If you ever find yourself in a Texas hotel, gazing out from the second floor, and thinking,

"Man, I’d love to shoot that buffalo over there…"

DON’T.

Apparently, shooting buffalo from a second-story window is illegal. First floor? Maybe. Third floor? No idea. But that second floor? Absolutely not.

Again, this raises so many questions:

Was there a buffalo hunting problem in Texas hotels at some point?
Was this law written because someone actually did this??
And if you’re in a city, where are you even finding buffalo to shoot?!

We may never know.

You Need a Permit to Walk Barefoot

If you love walking around barefoot, be careful, because in Texas, you might need a permit to do it.

Now, to be fair, this law applies mainly to businesses requiring shoes for hygiene reasons.

But the fact that there’s an actual permit involved is just next-level ridiculous.

Imagine walking into the permit office:

📝 “Yes, I’d like to apply for my barefoot walking license.”

Government official: “Of course, sir. That’ll be five dollars.”

Absolutely wild.

No Flirting in San Antonio (Sorry, Lovebirds!)

Last but certainly not least, if you’re in San Antonio, be careful how you flirt.

Apparently, it’s illegal to flirt using your hands or your eyes.

Uh… how else are you supposed to flirt??

So, if you’re out on the Riverwalk, don’t get too flirty with those eyebrow raises or winks, or you might just get a ticket for looking too good. 😂

Welcome to Texas, Y’all!

At the end of the day, Texas is an amazing place to live, but man, do we have some weird laws.

No buying liquor or cars on Sundays.
No selling your eyeballs (or any body parts, for that matter).
No standing while drinking beer in LeFors.
And for the love of all things holy, do NOT shoot a buffalo from your hotel window.

If you’re thinking of moving to Texas, hit me up! I’m a local realtor, and I’d love to help you find the perfect home. One where you can drink beer sitting down, flirt legally, and adjust your stockings without fear of imprisonment.

📩 Shoot me a message if you’re ready to make Texas your home!

Post written by Michael Stephens from Living Local Texas.